How to Live in Denmark

The nisse is a centuries-old figure in Danish folklore, and every December these tiny, mischievous spirits take center stage. While Santa Claus makes one big appearance late in the month, the nisse are active the whole season long.

With their short stature and bright red hats, nisse are often mistaken for Santa's elves, but they live very different lives. Rather than helping in a workshop, nisse belong to individual households. They slip in and out of the walls at night, hide everyday objects, turn milk strange colors, and generally make harmless trouble. On December 24 they expect a...

November always seems like the rainiest of Danish months, but it isn't, actually. October is. But November feels rainier, because the sky is so grey, and it gets dark so early, and the rain sometimes comes down in little freezing pellets.

Denmark is a watery country, not just its long coastline and many rivers and lakes, but also the fact it is mostly near sea level. Like the Netherlands nearby, it is extremely vulnerable to flooding.

Climate changes in recent decades have made it worse, and sudden cloudbursts – or skybrud– cause a lot of damage.

Election posters are a colorful part of democracy in Denmark. In October, the campaigns swing into gear, and when the whistle blows on a set date at precisely noon, teams of poster-hangers cover the country with the faces of their candidates. It's highly competitive; It's against the law to take down posters once they're hung, so there's a big rush to get your party's poster up first.

So on that October afternoon, you'll see teams of young people rushing about Copenhagen, Aarhus, and countryside towns with ladders, and hardback posters, and zip ties, and measuring sticks, because...

Denmark may be a small country, but it produces world-class athletes in cycling, tennis, handball, badminton, and golf. How do they do it? And how does the tax-financed effort to create athletic champions fit with the culture code of "Jante Law", the idea is that no one should think themselves better than anyone else?

September is when fall sports season starts in Denmark. The badminton league begins, so does volleyball and basketball and hockey.

Most importantly, the handball season kicks off, and while I'm not a handball fan myself, I always know when that season...

Denmark is a very good place to be a child, and to have children, yet the birthrate is dropping as it is in so many other countries. Some preschools have shut down due to lack of kids. Just this year Denmark reached a population of 6 million –  a big landmark -  but that's mostly due to immigration, not more children being born.

All the initiatives that experts recommend for increasing fertility in other countries already exist in Denmark, like child payments for parents, long parental leaves after childbirth, good universal day care, and tax-funded health care.

 The D...

July is vacation month in Denmark, and it's ironic that many Danes go elsewhere on vacation at just this time of year, when you have the best chance of good weather in Denmark. And I do mean chance – there is never any guarantee.

Some Danes go abroad, driving vacations to Southern Europe are popular. There's a well-known cycle in which the summer weather is good one year, so everyone plans a vacation in Denmark the following year, and then the weather is awful, so everyone plans a foreign vacation the next year, and then the weather is go...

As of this month, girls who turn 18 can be drafted into the Danish military. 

This is new, even though girls in Norway and Sweden have been eligible for the draft for some time. Denmark is proud of its record on gender equality, so maybe it's a wonder it hasn't happened sooner. After all, more than half of the medical doctors in Denmark are female.  More than half of the priests in Denmark are female. The prime minister is female. At only about 10% female, the military is clearly lagging behind.

The way the military draft in De...

There's a lovely May tradition in Denmark of setting a candle in the window on the evening of May 4. This is to commemorate the surrender of the Germans and the end of the Nazi occupation in 1945. 

The Nazis imposed a blackout on Denmark to confuse the Allied air forces, so now that they were defeated, a candle in a window became a small symbol of rebellious light.

I intend to participate every year on May 4, but I often forget, and to be honest I see very few candles in windows these days. 

A re...

As the long Danish winter finally draws to an end, it's time for Danes to start planting their gardens. 

Now, in early April, it's rhubarb, parsnips, cabbage. After the risk of frost is gone, in late April, you can put down some beets, and chives, and parsley – all good traditional Danish food. 

By May, you can try with the tomatoes, which may or may not ripen depending on whether you get a warm, sunny summer, always a roll of the dice in Denmark. One year we ended up with hard, green tomatoes in September. 

Shor...

Gækkebrev are a great Danish tradition, but like many other Danish traditions, they are fighting to survive amid the country's ambitious digital agenda. 

What is a gækkebrev, or gække letter? A single piece of paper, cut into a lace-like design somewhat like a snowflake, sent anonymously in the days before Easter.

A poem is handwritten on the letter, but it is unsigned...except for a number of dots that correspond to the number of letters in the sender's name.

If you can guess who sent the letter, that person owes you a...

Fastelavn is one of the Danes' favorite holidays. It takes place in February, when the light is finally beginning to come back after a long season of winter darkness. "Hitting the cat in the barrel" - which used to involve a real cat, but no longer does - and eating messy fastelavn buns full of custard are part of the holiday.

What's no longer really part of the holiday is its religious background, the idea that this is a party that takes place before the long lockdown of Lent. 

Kept the party, dumped the religion Duration: 00:06:55

If you're one of the bottom 80% of Danish earners, you'll probably spend most of your dark January evenings and weekends at home, hoping your bank account can recover from Christmas excesses. Restaurants have a lot of empty tables this time of year. Shops mostly process the return of unwanted Christmas presents.

Now, this can and often is packaged as hygge. Candles, TV, sweaters, warm slippers, hot tea. But it's often just being broke and not being able to go anywhere.

Yet if you're part of the top 20% of earners in Denmark, however, maybe even the...

Denmark, as Danes like to tell you, is a little country. But it used to be a much bigger country, a bit of an empire. Norway was once part of Denmark. Iceland was once part of Denmark. The southern half of Sweden and a bit of northern Germany used to be part of Denmark. What is now called the US Virgin Islands used to be part of Denmark.

And Denmark had colonies in Africa and India, which is why when you'll go into many Danish supermarkets – even online supermarkets – you'll see a section called Kolonial, or Colonial.

...

One of the tips I often give to newcomers in Denmark is to learn Danish through song lyrics. Find a Danish lyricist whose music you enjoy listening to on repeat. The repetition will help you get a feel for how the Danish language flows, and you'll have something to dance to during those long, dark winter months.

I did this myself when I first arrived in Denmark, and learned a great deal of Danish from the witty, self-mocking songs of Carsten Lykke.

Here are a few suggestions for your own Danish lyrics journey.

...

Denmark has one of the highest job mobility rates in the world - about 20% of Danes start new jobs each year. Frequent job changes are a reflection of the Danish concept of "flexicurity" – flexibility with the security of the welfare state. As a matter of fact, if you stay in the same job for many years in Denmark, people start to wonder why. 

Young people switch jobs the most, of course, but even people in the prime of their careers, as well as employees over 55, job hopping in Denmark is much more common than it is in oth...

Did you know that Copenhagen has its own color? It's called Copenhagen Green, and it's a dark emerald green, mixed with a fair amount of black. A little like the dark green we see on the leaves of trees here late in August. Pantone 3435C, for you designer types. 

You'll notice that all Copenhagen benches are this color, an you will see Copenhagen Green on many wooden doors and window frames in the old city, as well as lamp posts, railings, even small bridges in the beautiful Ørestedsparken.

This was a conscious decision by city le...

Many countries have a fictional character who represents them. Uncle Sam for the USA, Marianne in France, Mother India. Others have a legendary figure, who was real at one point but is now shrouded in myth, like King Arthur in England.

For Denmark, Holger Danske is both. He was probably real, although he didn't live in Denmark.

He was a Danish knight living in France in 8th century, serving Charlemagne and he appears in several of the epic poems of the time as Ogier the Dane. When those poems were translated into Old Norsk, he...

In June of each year, the streets of Denmark are suddenly full of young people wearing stiff white caps with bands of various colors - burgundy, midnight blue, light blue. These teenagers have just graduated from gymnasium, the Danish equivalent of high school, and the white hat is a sign of that accomplishment. 

They wear the white hat everywhere they go for the two or three weeks after final exams, and it awakens a deep sentimentality in the usually practical and private Danes. It has a sort of magic. 

When my daughter received her white ca...

If you're only in Denmark for a few months, it might not be worth the investment in time to learn much more than the basic pleasantries in Danish. But you plan to stay in Denmark for more than a year or so, it's a good idea to learn some Danish – and your visa may require that you do so.

Even if you're not forced to, it's a good idea to learn Danish if you plan to make a commitment to Denmark. It'll make daily life easier: you'll stop wanting to tear your hair out every time you ru...

A story I've heard over and over again when I talk to internationals working in Denmark is this: They thought they were going to get fired.

They'd been working for a year or so at professional-level job in Denmark, often one they'd been recruited for, but they'd never heard any positive comments from their manager.

They started to worry. They were doing their best, but maybe it just wasn't good enough.

Were they going to lose the job? Were they going to have to go back home, humiliated, and explain the whole thing...

Whether you're navigating the cobbled streets of Copenhagen on a first date, exploring the charming countryside with a new companion, or swiping right in the pursuit of love, this episode offers the inside scoop on Danish dating culture.

We explore different facets of the Danish dating scene, from casual meet-ups in cozy bodegas to the commitment in long-term relationships in Denmark. We bring you stories, expert advice, and real-life experiences about finding love and maintaining relationships in the happiest country on Earth.

Let's start by unpacking the Danish dating culture. Known for its direct communication...

Many internationals newly arrived in Denmark struggle with the long Danish winter. 

The darkness that starts to fall in the early afternoon means that 5pm looks just like 8pm, which looks just like midnight, which looks just like 5am.

Dense, inky black sky.

During the daytime there's a dim grey light, sometimes accompanied by a soupy fog of tiny raindrops.

It's tough to handle - even for Danes.

Many people living through this time in Denmark describe feeling low-energy – sløj is the very descriptive Danish term. It translates dire...

It's almost Week 1, in the weekly numbering system that's widely used in Northern Europe, where the year starts with week 1 and runs through to Week 52 or 53, depending on the calendar. It's very efficient for planning, so you don't have to say something messy like "What about that week that starts Monday June 3…"

Week 1 starts on January 1, and everything follows that in perfect order.

But before January 1 we have New Year's Eve, a day that fills me with trepidation to be honest, because in Denmark, New Year's Eve is all about amateur fireworks.

Cannonballs, Ro...

If you are an international who lives in Denmark, or someone who wants to, you have to learn the Danish way of dealing with conflict. This might be with a colleague, or your upstairs neighbors, or the authorities at the commune.

In these cases, it's very important not to lose your temper or raise your voice. And this can be tricky if the culture you come from, your culture of origin, is a passionate culture.

Denmark is not a passionate culture. If you hear someone talking about their passion here, it's almost always some sort...

Denmark is getting rich selling pharmaceuticals to other countries, but within Denmark itself, the approach is inconsistent. Getting illegal drugs doesn't seem to be too difficult, but getting legal drugs from your doctor can be.

When I first arrived in Denmark, you could shut down any dispute in Denmark by appealing to equality and the common good. Solidarity - "solidaritet" -  and "fælleskab", or community, or even "samfundssind", societal spirit, were magic words.

They still are with the older generation that built Denmark's welfare state. If you want to convince this generation of anything, just make a reference to solidarity and community and societal spirit. Works like a charm.

I'm often asked if the younger generation is as dedicated to these principles as their elders, and if they still fo...

Many people who visit Denmark are fans of the Vikings, the colloquial name for Scandinavians before the medieval era, although technically speaking the Viking raiders were at their peak in the years 800-1100. 

There are plenty of opportunities, especially now during tourist season, to see modern-day Danes dressed up as Vikings, building wooden ships, cooking over open fires, and fighting with swords and shields. Exhibitions like this are very popular with visitors from overseas. 

What they might not know is that you can see actual Vikings in Denmark, or what's left of their bodies. It wa...

In Denmark, the right to a long summer vacation is enshrined into law - the national vacation law, which states that all employees have a right to three weeks' vacation between May and September.

Shops close, too. An ice cream shop in my neighborhood closed down for the entire month of July last year. You would think this would be peak time for ice cream, but for the owners of the ice cream shop, their own vacation was more important.

This year, I noticed that the bicycle store up the street is closed for three...

Denmark is a rich country, but does it have rich people? It does, but Denmark's wealthy tend to keep a low profile, due to the informal Jante Law in Denmark that prohibits too much showing off. 

That said, spring and summer is great time to see Danish rich people in their natural habitat. That's when they put the roof down on their expensive German cars and drive through the medieval old towns, drink rosé chilled in silver buckets at fancy outdoor cafés, or sail through the harbor on their personal boats of various sizes. In the sum...

When you've been an international in Denmark for a while, as I have, you sometimes forget what it was like to arrive here for the first time and know nothing.

I remember arriving just about this time of year and being astonished by all the public holidays in spring. I'd arrived to work, but the office kept shutting down.

Now one of my various gigs is cultural training for newcomers, paid for by the big corporations that bring them here. The questions they ask bring me back to the time when I first arrived.

The hottest competitive sport in Denmark over the past year hasn't been handball, or football, or badminton. It's been chasing cheap butter in the supermarket.

Recent inflation has doubled the price of butter – in some places, up to 30 kroner – but if you rush, you can get…a package of butter for 10 kroner at one supermarket…wait, only three packages per customer…hey, this competing supermarket has matched the price…look, this other one has it for only 5 kroner…ohhhhhh, it's sold out for today. Better come earlier tomorrow.

Butter chasing is how even high-achieving, high-earning Danes have been...

It seems as if every country has a city or region that it is the butt of jokes. The rest of the country makes fun of the locals' unattractive accents and supposedly low-end behavior. In Denmark, that city is Randers.

Randers is a city in Northern Jutland, about a half hour away from Aarhus. It used to be bigger than Aarhus, and bigger than Aalborg too, but it was a manufacturing town, and when manufacturing fell apart in Denmark after the Second World War, so did Randers.

The stereotype of Randers today is...muscle meatheads...

A country like Denmark, with so much coastline and water, needs a lot of bridges - and there have been 5 new colorful, stylish bridges built in Copenhagen alone in the past decade.

And because this is Denmark, and people love design, each bridge has its own special look. You can't just put up a few bridge supports and a deck on top for traffic. You need style, and you need a colorful name.

Consider, for example, the multicolored Kissing Bridge in Copenhagen. It's not named that because you're supposed to kiss on the bridge, although y...

After some time out of Denmark, Kay returns and finds a whole new list of things to love.

Swimming in Copenhagen harbour is a delight - the once-industrial waterway has been cleaned up enough to become a giant swimming zone. 

The wild blackberry bushes are ready for harvest, and there are plenty in public spaces - like near the railway and S-train tracks - where the blackberries are totally free, first come, first serve. Wash them well and they make for a wonderful blackberry pie,  a blackberry crumble, or even a blackberry smoothie.

An...

It's hard to be a teenager no matter who you are or where you live, but spare a thought for the two teenagers of the Danish Royal Family. 16-year-old Christian - the future King Christian XI - and 15-year-old Isabella have to deal with family photo calls and media events, leaked Tik Tok videos, and a TV documentary this week accusing their boarding school of being a toxic environment.

Denmark has several amusement parks, including the original Legoland, but the ones I know best are the ones in Copenhagen - Tivoli Gardens and Bakken.

Tivoli and Bakken show two different sides of the Danish character.  

Tivoli is the sleek, confident, high-end image that Denmark likes to present to the world: it has exquisite flower gardens, fancy shops and restaurants, and a theater that hosts world-class performers. Bakken is more homey, more quirky, a little shabby, and a bit more hyggelig, under my own definition of hygge as "unambitious enjoyment". 

The differences between th...

It's springtime, and the cherry trees are about to bloom in Copenhagen Northwest, which is usually the only time people who live outside Northwest bother to go there.

Northwest is a working class neighborhood, so much so that the streets are named after working-class occupations.

While other Copenhagen neighborhoods have streets named after kings and queens and generals, Northwest has brick-maker street, and book-binder street, and rope-maker street, and a barrel-maker street.  

But there are other things to see in Northwest besides the cherry trees, which have become a bit of a crowd s...

Newcomers to Denmark often complain that the locals aren't chatty. Danes don't want to converse on the bus, or on the train, or in line at the supermarket, or really anyplace that isn't a designated social zone. Like the company canteen at lunch, or a dinner party at home to which they have invited a precise number of people to match the number of chairs that they own. In general, Danes rarely talk to strangers unless they are drunk, but there is one exception: Danish people over 75 years old.

Danes over 75, or even 70 or 65, often live alone, and they...

No matter how they feel about the institution of royalty, almost everyone likes Denmark's Queen Margrethe, who is celebrating 50 years on the throne this week.

Every New Year's Eve, the streets of Denmark go quiet as the Queen makes her annual televised speech to her subjects. I find the speeches pretty much the same every year, they're about being kind to each other, taking care of the environment, and such.

The real entertainment is in the Queen's wardrobe - she designs her own clothes, and often chooses rather un-Danishly bright colors -  and whether she'll g...

Drinking, and drinking heavily, is common in Denmark at holiday time. Whether it's the traditional "gløgg" - hot spiced wine with nuts, orange peel and a little brandy - or the specially-made (and specially-strong) Christmas beers, you'll be offered a great deal of alcohol at almost every seasonal social event.

But what if you're a nondrinker, or a light drinker? In this episode we'll tell you how to enjoy Christmas in Denmark while avoiding alcohol. 

Denmark has a thriving second-hand economy, in part because people generally don't look down on second-hand goods here.

The Danes are practical people – why should something be thrown out when it can be used again? And their passion for sustainability means it's cool to reuse something that already exists instead of manufacturing something new.

There is a network of "genbrug" (recycling) stations all over all over the country, where people can leave stuff they don't want and other people can take it for free.

And there's a thriving market for second-hand furniture in th...

Getting to Sweden from Copenhagen is easy: you take a quick trip across the Øresund Bridge in your car or on the train. Getting to Norway from Copenhagen isn't too hard: there's a ferry that runs every day from Nordhavn.

Getting to Germany from Copenhagen, on the other hand, is a headache. But in 2029, a new direct tunnel will open between Denmark and Germany. The Danes are building it with very little help from the Germans, who originally weren't too interested in a tunnel that went through an obscure and neglected part of their country. 

Th...

One of Denmark's cheapest and most colorful vacations is a few hours riding back and forth on Copenhagen's big yellow Harbor Bus, or "Havnebussen", a commuter ferry designed to transport ordinary citizens between downtown and the urban islands of Christianshavn and Amager.

For visitors to Copenhagen - or residents who need an inexpensive adventure -  the harbor bus can take you from tourist trap to high culture to party culture, from shabby little wood shacks to neighborhoods of chic glass apartment houses with their own private beach.

All for as little as 14 kroner, 2 d...

When I mentioned going to Esbjerg for a few days off this spring, many of my friends in Copenhagen said - why? Esbjerg doesn't have a reputation as a vacation spot, even though its fifth-largest city in Denmark and the youngest big city. 

For Copenhagen snobs, Esbjerg is a fishing town, which it was 50 years ago but isn't really anymore. It's an oil and wind energy town, industrial but very modern.

I like Esbjerg, perhaps because it is a very masculine town. If you're a woman who likes men, if you're a guy who likes m...

No matter what the tourist brochures suggest, you probably won't go *everywhere* on a bike in Denmark.

And along with food and housing, getting around is a big part of the cost of living in Denmark.

Here are a few tips to save money on trains, buses, cars, and even bike maintenance.

Anyone who has spent time living in Denmark knows that it's one of the most expensive countries around. That's true when it comes to food shopping, too.

One Dane who had lived in the US explained it this way: "In Denmark, every supermarket is priced like Whole Foods."

For those of you who haven't visited the States, Whole Foods is a high-end grocery chain nicknamed "Whole Wallet" or "Whole Paycheck."

But there are a few creative ways to save money on food in Denmark.

Danes hate food waste, so the prices...

I love old books. I love the kind of old books you get at antique bookstores or on the Internet Archive. And I have a good collection of old books about Denmark.

I like old travel guides, most of which are still pretty useful because Denmark doesn't tear a lot of things down the way they do, in say, Los Angeles or Hong Kong. In Denmark you'll pretty much fine most castles and monuments right where somebody left them hundreds of years ago. 

If you want to see a famous church or square or the J...

While I'm not an authority on the Danish visa or immigration systems, I'm often asked for practical tips about moving to Denmark. So here are a few things to think about when you're packing your suitcases or, if you're doing a corporate move, packing your shipping container.

Number one, make sure you bring money. Denmark is an expensive place to live where you will own less stuff, but better stuff.

That said, there's no need to bring much furniture, even mores if your furniture is nothing special.

You can often buy Danish design...

Denmark has had two female prime ministers and about forty percent of the people elected to the Folketing, the Danish Parliament, are women. 

But when it comes to private industry, Danish women have one of the lowest participation rates in management in Europe. According to the OECD, only 26.5% of managers in Denmark are female, compared to 39.8% in the US.

It's not unusual to see a senior management team made up entirely of Danish males, with perhaps a Swedish or German male thrown in for diversity. 

That said, the majority of adult Danish women ho...

It might seem like a counterintuitive time to talk about beaches, in the middle of a long, very cold winter.

But in these times of COVID, beaches are one of the few places in Denmark you are currently allowed to meet up with family and friends.

Beaches, parks, frozen-over lakes: these are the big social meeting points at time when cafés, restaurants, bars, shops, gyms, schools, theaters, museums, places of worship, and hairdressers, barbers, and nail salons are all closed. 

But getting a small group together outdoors is still allowed, and the be...

I like to drive. I like to be on the open road, like in the American Southwest - Arizona, Nevada, Utah. Put your pedal to the metal, no one in front of you, no one in the rear view mirror. Just you and the road.

You will not get that experience much in Denmark, a small country with a lot of people packed into a small area. There's not a lot of open land here, not much living off the grid. Which doesn't mean drivers don't long for it. You'll see those open roads in Arizona and...

When visiting Denmark, you'll be offered Danish food, and expressing enthusiasm for it will go a long way towards generating harmony with your Danish friends.

The good news is, Danish cuisine offers something for everyone. 

If you're a carnivore, don't miss the Danish pork dishes, particularly "flæskesteg". That's a crispy, fatty fried pork that's the official national food.

For people who prefer fish, there's a great selection in this country surrounded by water. Curried herring and fried plaice are popular, and so are many types of salmon.

Vegans can enjoy a...

It's a funny kind of summer this year in Copenhagen, quieter than usual, and more like a family event than a cosmopolitan city.

Coronavirus came early to Denmark, the borders were shut down early, but they're mostly open now to other Europeans.

But the change came too late for many people to make summer vacation plans, so many of the usual tourist attractions are slightly forlorn. 

There are a few Europeans around the Little Mermaid and the Royal Palaces, but not many. And there are no huge cruise ships full of Americans docking a...

Among the many cultural questions I ask audiences during my How to Live in Denmark Game Show is "Which animal represents Denmark best?"?

There never seems to be an obvious or generally agreed-upon answer. Sure, the bear represents Russia, the elephant Thailand, and the bald eagle the United States. But what about Denmark?

Denmark does have a national animal – the mute swan (Cygnus olor) – but an image of a swan doesn't provoke the kind of immediate association with Denmark that, say, a koala bear does with Australia.

That said, mute swans are easy to find...

Alcohol has a long history in Denmark. The Vikings brewed four types of beverages: ale, mead, fruit wine, and syra, a fermented milk – and for many centuries Danish babies have eaten øllebrød, which is a mix of old bread scraps and beer.

Fast forward a few centuries, and alcohol is still part of almost every Danish gathering.

Early in 2020, the EU Commission reported that Denmark placed an unhappy first in Europe in binge drinking and that it was one of the reasons Danes have the shortest expected lifespan in Western Europe.

According to t...

January, February, and March are some of the dreariest months in Denmark – it's dark, with no Christmas lights to pep it up – and many people are dealing with a heavy load of year-end debt from traveling, parties, dining out, and gifts.

Along with religion, personal finance is a topic that is rarely discussed in Denmark. But the country has one of the highest rates of household debt in the world. 

And once you get into debt in Denmark, it can be very difficult to get out.

If you're newly arrived in Denmark, making Danish friends is not easy – in fact, surveys show that one of the main reasons internationals end up leaving is the difficulty of building a network.

The irony is that Danes are actually very good at friendship. Their friendships are strong, reliable, and deep-rooted. Friends can count on each other.

But because Danes take friendships so seriously, they like to keep their number of friendships under control. They don't want to take on more friends than they can keep their deep commitment to.

The statement "I ju...

The relaxed approach to nudity in Denmark can be a surprise for many newcomers.

It's something they're often confronted with at the local swimming hall, where a very large and strong attendant insists that they take off their entire swimsuit and shower thoroughly before going into the pool.

Stripping off in front of strangers is new for a lot of internationals, and some try to place it a larger context of Danish morality.

It hasn't been entirely forgotten that Denmark was the first country in the world to legalize pornography in 1967. Some people st...

"Is there politeness in Denmark?" 

That was the question I was recently invited on a national TV show to discuss.

The implication was that I was supposed to say that Danes were not at all polite, because effusive praise and cheerful agreement make for a rather dull TV show.

But Danes are not impolite. They have their own version of courteous behaviour, which is based on reinforcing aspects of their culture that they care about.

One of my favorite types of speaking engagement is introducing Denmark to some of the smart, motivated young people arriving from around the world to study at Danish universities.

Since the publication of my first book, How to Live in Denmark, I've been speaking regularly to audiences of new arrivals, and I probably learn as much from them as they learn from me.

Among the things I've learned is that the aspects of Danish culture that the Danes are most proud of can be troublesome for newcomers.

Planning your summer vacation in Denmark is like playing the lottery. You could hit it lucky, with golden days and long, warm evenings, when you can sit with friends in the soft light and drink hyldeblomst cocktails.

Or you could get grey day after grey day, interspersed with a little rain whenever it is least convenient. The weather could be chilly, leaving your cute new summer clothes to sit disappointed in your closet while you wear your boring long trousers again and again.

I find that locals tend to base their decision about whether to st...

April 1st is April Fool's Day – Aprilsnar in Danish – and each Danish newspaper will feature a clever but false story for the unwary to be fooled by.

To some extent every day is April Fool's Day in Denmark, because Danish humor is a rough humor. Danes show affection by making fun of each other. And, as an international, they might make fun of you too.

This is a good thing: that means they have accepted you into the circle of Danishness.

But it doesn't mean that the intersection of non-Danes and Danish humor is ent...

Motivating Danish employees is very different than motivating other groups of people because there are two big factors missing – hierarchy and fear. 

We don't like to talk about the fear part in our various countries of origin, but the fact is true that in the US, UK, China, India, and in parts of Europe, someone who loses their job can be in a lot of trouble. They may have trouble paying their bills, might lose their house, might not have access to health care, might not be able to send their kids to university.

That's not...

Denmark is a quiet country, even within the cities. Especially this time of year, February, when it's too cold to do anything but scurry from place to place, when the street cafés are closed and no one wants to eat their lunch in the park. The Danes are hibernating in their homes until the spring.

And especially when a blanket of snow covers the cities and countryside. Then everything around you will be beautifully, peacefully, totally quiet.

This Danish quiet can freak out a lot of internationals when they first arrive.

The D...

As the new academic semester starts up, some of you may be planning to live in a Danish home. It could be you'll rent a room in a household, maybe you'll be part of a Danish host family, or maybe you'll just be staying with Danish friends.

I thought it might be useful to have some tips on living with a Danish family.

First of all, if you're used to having your parents or domestic workers do most of the household chores – things are about to change.

Danish families generally don't have live-in do...

Being alone for Christmas in Denmark can be tough – one of the downsides of Danish "hygge" is that people who are not inside the "hygge" circle can feel shut out and very alone.

Here are our tips for having a good holiday anyway.

Like so many other aspects of life in Denmark, gift giving in the holiday season comes with dozens of unwritten rules and unspoken expectations.

Should you give a gift to your boss? What about your colleagues? Will you and your Danish friends exchange gifts? And why does almost every store in Denmark ask if you want a "gift sticker" when you buy something?

Here are a few basic tips about gift giving in Denmark.

Autumn in Denmark actually starts in mid-August, when the kids go back to school. Danish kids have a very short holiday – usually only about 6 weeks.

By late August, you can definitely feel a little fall crispness in the air. By September the leaves start to turn color, and by the end of October many of the trees are already bare for the winter.

But what really defines fall in Denmark is the slow fading of the light.

This is a special episode, because this is the fifth anniversary of the How to Live in Denmark podcast.The podcast began in the summer of 2013; at the time I'm recording this, it is near the end of Summer 2018. We've had more than 80 episodes and around a million streams and downloads. Most importantly, I've received a lot of messages from people like you saying that the podcast and the books that have come out of the podcast have been really helpful for you in adjusting to Denmark. I'm so happy to hear that.

I originally came to...

Learning to speak Danish can be difficult, even if you speak its close linguistic cousins, English and German.

While the written language isn’t too tough to figure out, the spoken language is a headache. Danes pronounce only small bits of each word and smash those small bits together.

Even the Swedes and Norwegians have trouble understanding spoken Danish.

If you’re only in Denmark for a short time, is it worth it to learn more than just the basic pleasantries in Danish?

There's no reason to spend a lot on what you wear to work in Denmark. Danes, by nature, are not flashy dressers.

In most Danish business environments, you'll be perfectly well dressed in a fitted pair of business trousers, dark shoes, and a solid-color sweater or dress shirt. Male or female, you'll never go wrong with quiet colors like burgundy, dark blue, dark green, black or - for the adventurous - beige. 

Subtle good taste is the preferred style. Obvious designer labels are considered tacky, but quality cut and fabric are appreciated.

On your first day at work in Denmark, you may find a pretty bouquet of flowers on your desk to welcome you.

(This terrified a Chinese acquaintance of mine, who was accustomed to receiving flowers on her *last* day at work. She thought she'd been fired before she ever sat down.)

In Denmark, the bouquet is just a way to say "welcome" and to add some sunshine to an arduous day that is sure to include many handshakes and computer passwords.

Someone will probably be appointed as your "mentor" on the first d...

Many Danes meet their future spouses at work. Yet there are also strict laws in Denmark against sexual harassment.

Where do you draw a line between harassment and two adults developing tender feelings for each other?

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Given the Danes' fondness for alcohol, many inter-office romances start at the annual Christmas party. Ms. X and Mr. Y drink a bottle of wine or two, wiggle suggestively together on the dance floor, and depart to one or the other's home in a taxi to complete the evening. The next morning, they discuss whether they are...

In an anti-authoritarian country like Denmark, being a boss is a precarious (social) position. Danish bosses don't like to flaunt their authority.

In fact, when you enter a room of Danes, it is often difficult to tell which one is the boss. The social cues that point to a big cheese in other cultures – the flashy watch, the oversize office, the glamorous yet servile executive assistant – are considered poor taste in egalitarian Denmark.

So are the booming, take-charge personalities many foreigners may expect from a boss.

Denmark is a flat country. It is flat...

People visiting Denmark can't help but notice that the Danish flag is everywhere.

Christmas trees here are decorated with little Danish flags. Cucumbers in the supermarket have Danish flags on them to show they're grown in Denmark. Whenever a member of the Danish royal family has a birthday, two little Danish flags are stuck on the front of every Copenhagen bus.

The Danish flag is closely associated with Danish birthdays. If you have a birthday when you're working in a Danish office, one of your colleagues is likely to put a Danish flag on your...

On-the-job benefits in Denmark come in three categories: the kind every Danish worker gets, the kind everyone at your company gets, and the kind everyone at a certain level in your company gets.

 When you talk with a future employer, you can negotiate your salary, but there's not all that much room for negotiation on benefits.

In most cases, as American kindergarteners say, "You get what you get and you don't get upset." Fortunately, the benefits tend to be generous.

This is a chapter from my upcoming book, "How to Work in Denmark." Duration: 00:08:37

If you live in Denmark or follow the Danish media, you'll know there's been a lot of talk of gangsters over the past week. One Danish gang is trying to expand at the expense of another gang, and this summer there have been about 25 shootings in Copenhagen, generally in the northern neighborhoods – my neighbourhood.

Somebody was shot outside my supermarket, somebody else was shot outside the school near my house, and a couple of people have been shot just walking down the street.

Most of the victims are other gangsters, but a few have been un...

If you're coming from abroad to work in Denmark, you may be bringing along your spouse. That can be great – it's nice to have someone to shiver through the Danish summer with.

But unhappy spouses are one of the main reasons that people who come to work in Denmark end up leaving.

Denmark is not an easy place to make friends, given that Danish culture tends toward "respecting your privacy" by not striking up conversations with strangers.

It can also be tough for spouses to get jobs in Denmark, particularly well-educated spouses seeking jo...

One of the most important words in the Danish language is "ligestilling"  – equality. The belief that all (Danish) people are basically equal permeates every relationship and every interaction.

Fancy job titles do not fit into that passion for equality. They suggest you think you're better than someone else. Which you might actually be, if you've worked your way to the top of your field, but that admission is slightly embarrassing.

If you do have an impressive job title, it's considered bad taste to show it off.

Office doors in Denmark, for example, usually hav...

When you first arrive in Denmark to work or look for work, the last thing you need is another monthly expense. So many foreigners "save money" by not joining a union.

And I was one of them. To be honest, joining a union never even occurred to me.

In the US, unions are either for hands-on workers – steelworkers, hotel maids – or for civil servants, like schoolteachers and cops. Knowledge workers and creative types are almost never unionized.

But that's not true in Denmark, where engineers, doctors, lawyers, bankers, managers, and writers regularly join unio...

Networking in Denmark is tough, even for Danes. This is a culture where it's considered bad manners to talk to someone you don't know, unless you're drunk, in which case all bets are off.

That said, most jobs in Denmark are found via networks. Somebody mentions on their LinkedIn profile that they're looking for a new team member and the cv's from friends of friends and old classmates start flowing in. And since "fitting in" is such an important part of the Danish work culture, someone from the network is more likely to seem like a known...

When you work in a Danish office, you'll often find yourself invited to impromptu in-office social events with your Danish colleagues. Somebody's birthday, someone's having a baby, somebody has been with the company for 10 years, someone is going on vacation the next day. And they almost all involve cake.

Cake is very important in Denmark. Cake builds bridges. Cake makes friends. And when there's cake on offer, as a foreigner, it's a good idea to show up and accept it.

When I first started working in a Danish office, I made a big mistake. I...

When I first began working in Denmark, people used to start saying around April or May, "So – are you taking three or four?"

What they meant was, are you taking three or four weeks off for your summer vacation?

 Now, in the United States, where I come from, even taking two weeks off is extravagant. You always have the feeling that if you're gone too long, there may not be a job waiting for you when you get back.

In Denmark, a long summer vacation is legally required. If you have a full-time job...

If you've been asked for a job interview at a Danish company, congratulations. Danish companies don't like to waste time, so they wouldn't be setting aside time to meet you if they didn't think there was a solid chance they might hire you.

Job interviewing in Denmark is a difficult balance, because the Jantelov makes all forms of bragging or self-promotion distasteful to the Danes. You've got to convince the person interviewing you that you're skilled and capable without sounding like a used car salesman.

I often give presentations to job hunters in Denmark, and I tell them there are two words you can add to your cover letter that will virtually guarantee that it will be carefully read.

What are those two words?

The name of someone you know who already works at the company.

Of course, you should only use a current employee's name with his or her permission, and ask each time you use it. There's always the chance that your contact and this particular hiring manager may be bitter enemies, or that a company...

When you're putting together a cv for Denmark, titles and grades and long descriptions of examinations (unless they're required for the job, as they are for accountants, architects and engineers) aren't a golden ticket to employment, even if you've attended an excellent school.  

Your Danish cv should focus on projects you've worked on, and how your contributions to those projects relate to the job at hand.

Foreigners in general are often trying to look for a job in a way that works well in their home country, not Denmark.

Basically, this works as about as well as trying to tell your new girlfriend the same jokes that made your old girlfriend laugh. If the setting is Denmark, the approach has to be Danish.

Danish jobs are all about independence and teamwork. It's not like they need a red Lego brick and you have to convince them you're a red Lego brick to get the job. The employer has a problem that...

In Denmark, romance is like a two-speed bike. Speed one is casual sexual affairs with someone you may never see again: speed two is a serious relationship where you'll be expected to go to all your partner's dull family events. There's not much of a middle. And what there definitely is not is dating.

If you really want to get a Dane all hot and bothered, start talking about some thing that is beautifully designed.

In Denmark, beauty is usually found in something practical that has been very well designed. Housewares, particularly kitchenwares, are a Danish design favorite.

They don't have to be from expensive materials, but they have to be simple, streamlined, and work flawlessly. The beauty is in the usefulness.

August in Denmark brings the first signs of fall: a crisp chill in the air, the changing color of the leaves, the annual posters warning drivers to be aware of small children riding their bikes to school for the first time.

And foreign university students in the local 7-11, asking that their buns be warmed up.

I saw a newly-arrived young American student in my local 7-11 this morning, asking that her newly-purchased bun be warmed. The 7-11 clerk told her sorry, but there were no bun-warming services available at that branch.

She...

Denmark is a small country, and Danish people tend to think small things are good. Small cars. Small homes. Small ambitions when it comes to international team sports. But one thing in Denmark is never small – a baby carriage.

Danes seem to believe that a carriage (or pram) for a new baby should be roughly the size of a hotel room on wheels.

Inside, baby will be wrapped up warm with a fat feather blanket – even in the summer. There will also be room for pillows, books, toys, snacks, diapers and extra clothes in the gian...

Every country changes, and so does Denmark. When I hold How to Live in Denmark events, people often ask me how Denmark is changing, or has changed since I got here fifteen years ago. I could name a hundred things, but the first one that always comes to mind is food and drink.

Shotglasses are out, snaps and Gammel Dansk is out, fine wine (almost always bought on sale at the supermarket) is in.

The small food stores that used to be on every corner in Denmark – the 'pålæg' or sausage shop, the fish sh...

In general, Denmark is not a fearful country.  You could argue, what is there to be afraid of in Denmark?  It seems like a safe little corner of the world.  Tax-funded social programs make it unlikely you'll go hungry or homeless, as long as you have that little yellow social service card that shows you're here legally. Your medical care and education is paid for by taxes – yours or somebody else's.  Even if you lose your job – and it's very easy in Denmark for companies to get rid of workers they don't want – there is the social safety net to catch y...

It's spring in Denmark, and spring is by far my favorite season here. The wonderful white Scandinavian sunlight is back after the dark days of the winter, the flowers are coming out on the trees, and everybody's in a good mood. The outdoor cafés are full of people again – sometimes draped in blankets to keep warm, but outside all the same.

April and May are often the best months for weather in Denmark, along with September. Summers can be rainy. And April is when Tivoli opens in Copenhagen. (Side note: when you see a man in Den...

It has been said that Danish birthdays are the most important in the world. Adults, children, even the Queen of Denmark make a big deal about birthdays. And there is specific set of birthday rules and traditions for every age and role you play in life. Let's face it, Danish birthday traditions are a minefield for foreigners. Get it wrong and you could make some serious birthday faux pas.

For example, if the sun is shining on your birthday, you may find Danish people thanking you. 'Thanks for the sunshine' they'll say. This is because in Danish...

There have been very few international singing stars from Denmark, and that's a surprise, because Danish people love to sing.

Joining choirs is very popular, and Danish schoolchildren often start the week with a song – in my daughter's school, all the grades get together and sing something from the school's common songbook. 

There's actually a kind of common songbook for all the children of Denmark, called 'Det Små Synger', where you can find classics like 'Se Min Kjole'  (See my dress), Lille Peter Edderkop (Little Peter Spider) orOles Nye Autobil, Ole's new car.  Ole's new car is...

I was on Danish morning TV recently, which isn't really something to boast about.  In a country of 5 million, 10 guests a show, 365 days a year – you do the math.  Just about everyone gets on TV sooner or later.   Some of my friends and colleagues mentioned that they had seen me, stumbling through with my imperfect Danish, trying to promote my book, How to Live in Denmark.  But just SOME of my friends and colleagues, not all.  Specifically, it was my friends and colleagues who work in trendy creative industries - advertising, app designers, actors.

That's because I...

I've just arrived back in Denmark after a couple of weeks in the US and the night I got back, my cat bit me. This was not just a little affectionate peck - Fluffy used her sharp teeth, her fangs, to create four bleeding puncture wounds in my leg. I suppose it was partly my fault – I put a call on speakerphone. Fluffy doesn't like speakerphone, because she can hear a person, but she can't see one, so she assumes I'm some evil magician who has put a person inside a little glowing box, and she bites me.

...

There was no How to Live in Denmark podcast last week, and I apologize for that.  I have been busy studying for my Danish citizenship exam.  As some of you may know, Denmark is allowing double citizenship as of next year. 

That means you're are allowed to keep your home country passport  - in my case, USA - while also becoming a Danish citizen.  Personally, I'm a little concerned that this may be overturned if a right wing government takes power next year. Danske Folkeparti, which is now the biggest party in Denmark, is passionately oppose...