Roho Rest Hour

This Monday is an encouragement for anyone who’s experienced a setback—when something you had your heart set on didn’t happen.

I reflect on the idea that sometimes what feels like loss or disappointment is actually things moving out of the way. People, opportunities, and seasons come into our lives with an assignment—and when that assignment is complete, it’s time to release them.

The work now is clarity:What was their assignment?What is mine?And am I aligned with what’s next?

Even when I’ve been tired—so tired I didn’...

Here’s what’s sitting with me this morning:

We talk a lot about “that’s just my wiring.”But wiring is not identity — it’s a pattern.And patterns can be rewired.

If a house can be rewired…If a computer can get a whole new program installed…So can you.

Real, lasting, soul-level change isn’t impossible.Even the changes that feel way outside the realm of what you thought you could have or become.They are available.They are accessible.They are yours.

When you tap into your own divine resources...

There comes a point when you stop trying to prove your goodness to people who are committed to misunderstanding you.

I’ve watched people defend harm because they need to stay in someone’s good graces. That’s part of the racket. The hustle. Even when harm is done, there’s often a small legion still chasing connection—still trying to earn approval.

But I don’t live there anymore.

I know the truth now. My only job is to live my life—and live it in truth. The light will shine, and some will see...

Go Do Something. What is YOUR Thing?

For so many of us, life has been a series of responses — to stress, to expectations, to survival. But there comes a moment when your soul starts whispering: It’s time to make something. To create instead of cope. To listen instead of react.

We each have a thing — that unique way you bring light, ease, or transformation into the world. It doesn’t have to be public or polished. It doesn’t have to be in lights. Your “thing” might be how you love young people, how you bring calm...

The Arrival Choice

All that hustling, striving, and pushing?It keeps you from your power.

When you finally arrive, your identity is no longer built on labor, endurance, or how much you can take and still stand up again. That’s the world of becoming — and yes, there’s value in it. There’s nobility in the climb.

But we can get so obsessed with the path that the idea of actually arriving starts to feel like a threat. Because what happens when you no longer have to prove yourself through struggle? Who are you...

We’re often experts at remembering — recalling what’s behind us, revisiting what’s been lost or broken. But imagining? Creating something new? That’s where our energy can stall.

This week, let’s flip that script.All that has happened — the endings, the shake-ups, the lessons — isn’t punishment. It’s a kickstart to your next vision.

Affirmation:I embrace my vision with energy and determination, turning my dreams into actionable steps. Every ending is the beginning of a new journey. I meet it with a heart full of possibility.

As you move through this we...

The Cost of Freedom

There’s nothing sensible about liberation. It rarely looks good on paper. The math don’t be mathin’.

I’m paying an attorney—not to win something, but to stop engaging with someone who thrives on confusion. To buy distance. To buy peace.

Sometimes freedom costs money, sleep, or relationships. Sometimes it costs your reputation. But if it restores your sanity, it’s worth it.

Stop Fixing What’s Breaking You

Stop trying to fix people who keep breaking you. Stop explaining your boundaries to those who have...

One of the deepest sources of peace is knowing you’ve done your best—truly, to the best of your ability. That alone is enough. That alone lets you lay your head down at night and rest easy.

But often, even when we’ve done our best, we still carry stress, worry, and weight that isn’t ours to hold. This week, I invite you to experiment with surrender. Find the one thing you’ve been stressing over the most. Don’t fight it. Don’t wrestle it. Just place it in the hands of God, the universe, your...

What I know for sure: I will not live in the box other people built for me.Not the box of their expectations.Not the box of their potential.Not even the box of who I used to be.

For too long, I lived in reaction—responding to what life threw at me, adjusting to other people’s chaos, shrinking myself to fit into situations that drained me.

No more.

Liberation is a choice. Creation is a choice. And I am choosing both.

From here on, my energy goes into what I cr...

Let me be real: this divorce process has me heated.Specifically—the house.

I wanted to scream: This house is mine. I earned it. I paid for it. I carried everything on my back. I’m entitled to it.

And you know what? That anger felt good. It felt justified. It felt like the least God could give me after everything I’ve poured out.

But then my deeper wisdom came for me.It whispered: Clutching this hard… is that really who you are? Is it possible that holding on so tight to this one...

When you are clear about where you’re going, and you’re pouring your time and energy into that vision — the noise doesn’t matter. Not the feedback, not the doubt, not even the fear of falling on your face. Because if I fall, at least I fell chasing something that mattered, something in service of a bigger game.

And here’s the truth: I’ve never once pursued something that resonated in my gut, followed the vision that called me forward, and later thought, “I wish I hadn’t done that.” Never. It’s like going to the gym — you may...

Pretense will keep you stuck. You can’t move forward while you’re still tangled up in fear, false fronts, and giving away your power. Unraveling is the work of pulling those threads loose—seeing where you’ve been pretending, where you’ve abandoned yourself, where you’ve centered everybody else’s needs but your own.

It’s messy. It’s uncomfortable. And it’s necessary. Because only on the other side of unraveling can you see what’s real—and choose what actually gets to come with you.

This week’s affirmation:

Affirmation from my book...

This week, I’m leaning into pure honesty and personal integrity. It’s exhausting to pretend, to people-please, or to say yes when your soul says no. That kind of pressure eats away at our bodies, minds, and spirits.

Maybe it’s time for a mindset shift: What if everything you’re going through — the hard breaks, the losses, the quiet moments — is actually a gift? When I lost nearly all my clients after the DEI wave passed, it felt like devastation. But in that silence, I found relief — a space free of noise, pressure, and distraction. For two weeks...

There I was, on a tiny plane taking this 20-minute flight to the City, staring at an empty co-pilot seat. And something in me said, Ask. The old scripts kicked in—Don’t be too much. Don’t ask for special treatment. Don’t draw attention. But this time, I ignored them. I walked up and made the request. And the pilot? He smiled, patted the seat, and said, “Come, mama.” Just like that.

What struck me wasn’t the view (though it was stunning)—it was the truth: A whole world opens up when you’re willing to ask. No...

I am now in San Pedro, Belize. Or as Madonna calls it “La Isla Bonita”.

Bill Withers’ “Lovely Day” is on repeat. I am both overwhelmed and humbled by the beauty here. It is not perfect. But I am. Here, I feel perfect. As in, whole and complete. Nothing to fix. Nothing to prove or IMprove. I’m not “tired” here. I love my country, but we are in bad shape right now, and I HAD to find some goodness, some peace and some radical detachment so that I can breathe.

I wish for everyone reading this to...

Peace. I’m choosing peace. And liberation.

I’m thinking about peace.Not as a soft ending, but as a strong beginning.What can you make peace with,so you can finally choose something different?

I pulled from my book, I’m Leaving Now: A Little Book About Big Separations—and what came through was simple, but sharp:Rest your soul.

Not someday.Today.

Find a quiet space.Breathe.Let the judgment go.Ask yourself the one question that’s become my compass:Does this bring rest to my soul?

That’s t...

Happy Monday!

This week’s I send a gentle reminder: You were never meant to hold it all. You were never sent here to rescue everyone. And the storm you’ve been trying to fix? It’s not even yours.

We are exhausted—spiritually, emotionally, physically—often from trying to manage other people’s chaos, hold the ground steady, and “save” folks who don’t even want shelter. Stop it.

This week’s message is a call to release, to stop over-functioning, to stop spinning your soul in circles trying to anticipate someone else's lesson.

This woman was about to bust my windows out and call the dog patrol—with zero context. Didn’t ask, didn’t check, just reacted.

Listen. To often we will make a permanent decision based on temporary feelings and imagined stories.

You saw something, sure. But you didn’t ask anything.We’ve all done it—seen a messy yard and assumed they were lazy.But maybe they’re getting evicted. Maybe they’re grieving. Maybe they’re fighting battles you’ve never had to face.

One piece of data ≠ the whole story.Ask some damn question...

I sat through this movie that claimed to tell our story—as Black women. And instead, it reopened wounds that are already struggling to heal.

Yes, I know some folks felt seen.Yes, I know the cycle of poverty, trauma, and survival needs to be told.But what happens when the telling hurts the people it's supposed to represent?

Mr. Perry, sir...Who was this movie for?

Because I walked away feeling raw.Confused.Frustrated.Hurt.

Taraji acted her entire face off. That’s not the question.The question is:Why do w...

“Try on the freedom of not caring… about the things that don’t deserve your life force.”

This week, I'm thinking about the complexity of being alive.The part of us that wants to control things… and the deeper part that just wants to feel feel alive.

Not numb.Not perfect.Not even ready sometimes.Just here. Just present. Just Alive.

Even when it’s hard.

I talked about it this week from Belize — that maybe I will just “Forrest Gump” my way through life.

Just following the next thing that present...

This week’s rant is a reminder: if all you’ve got is outrage, you might be hammering where listening would build more. I’m not here to debate values—I’m here to start with shared human needs. That’s where change can begin. No shame. No yelling. Just strategy, grace, and a better way forward.

Just because they’re saying it with a straight face doesn’t mean it’s true.You know it’s a lie.But the part that spins you out—the part that keeps you tangled—is wondering if they know it’s a lie too.

Spoiler: They do. Or worse, they’ve convinced themselves they don’t.Either way—don’t engage.

You’re not crazy.The situation is.

And the wildest thing?They need your energy to keep the cycle going. They need your debate. Your fire. Your fight.So when you go quiet—not shut down...

There is something profoundly liberating about realizing you could leave — the job, the relationship, the role, the pattern. Even if you didn’t choose to then, you can now.

When we revisit our past with clarity instead of shame, we shift from helplessness to ownership. Not everything that happened to us was our fault — but some of what happened was shaped by the choices we didn’t make. That’s not failure. That’s information. That’s wisdom.

You are not just the result of what’s been done to you.You are also the result of what y...

Not everyone will get your decision—and they don’t need to. This rant is for the people who’ve been waiting for “approval” that’s never coming. If you’ve ever shrunk your dreams to fit someone else’s comfort zone… yeah, we’re talking about that.

There’s a version of you—somewhere in your past—who didn’t know what you know now.She stayed too long. Chose wrong. Fell apart. Held it together. Survived things you’ve never told anyone.

And still… she got you here.

This week, I want to invite you to do one thing:Stop looking back with shame.In fact, stop looking back. She went through all she went through for you to look ahead.

Thank her for passing you the baton.Then run forward with your head high and your heart wide open.

...

You don’t have to stay polite. You don’t have to “process it later.” You don’t need one more journal entry or therapy session to earn your release. You need to feel it, name it, rage if you have to—and then move on.

You get to be done.You get to say, “FUCK this.”You get to reclaim your energy, your joy, your brilliance.

Because that weight is costing you.Opportunities. Rest. Connection. Money. Your own fucking power.

So let me be the one to say it out loud today:Fuck. That. Shit...

Ever look back at an old version of yourself and cringe?What if that version—the one who chose the toxic job, the messy relationship, the hard road—was actually the HERO of your story?

In this video, I break down why your past self deserves more than shame… they deserve a fucking standing ovation.

Because they got you HERE.

And the real question is: Are you gonna waste what they survived for?

If you're in a major transition, you need to hear this. This isn’t just about growth. It’s about ho...

Toxic relationships (and toxic people) operate on a strategy—to isolate you, make you bury your pain in shame, and convince you that speaking up would be more embarrassing than enduring the nonsense.

Jennifer Lewis said it best about her love/money scammer: “He though I’d be too embarrassed to tell the truth. But here’s the reality—shame and abuse survive in silence.

The moment you say out loud:

* ‘I saw the signs and ignored them.’

* ‘I stayed too long.’

* ‘I’m angry at myself for trusting them.’

…is the m...

Why is it that women Black women speak their truth or protect themselves from Black men, is it seen as betrayal? A betrayal against the “culture”.

Even worse, why is it that our biggest challengers are other Black Women?

We’ve got to talk about this.Out loud. In truth. In love.In collaboration, not competition.Not from fear, not guilt, not obligation.But because we are human.

Black women are deserving of dignity.Black women are deserving of safety.Black women are deserving of compassion.

To ask her to be “soft” wi...

Perception says:"This is too much.""We’re losing.""Everything’s falling apart."

But perspective says:"I have a role.""I know what’s mine to carry.""I trust the bigger picture, even when I can't see all of it."

We’ve confused reaction for reality.Perception is instant—it’s fear, urgency, overwhelm.Perspective is cultivated—it’s clarity, rootedness, divine assignment.

Whether you're a Kamala holding office, or a quiet center where the Kamalas come to rest—your role matters.

Keep your perspective.

A big part of healing is reckoning with the lie you wanted to believe.

We don’t talk enough about the grief that comes from realizing someone never intended to keep their promise—not because they couldn’t, but because they never planned to.

When you're someone who moves with integrity, it's a shock to learn how many people don’t. But that's where intuition steps in—the divine knowing we too often ignore.

This season isn’t about revenge or regret. It’s about reclaiming your clarity, protecting your peace, and learning how to trust y...

This week’s rant is about the movie, Sinners—those smooth-talking, soul-sucking vampires that show up with charm and chaos in equal measure. The real question isn't just, Why do they knock at my door? It’s Why do we invite them in?

Why do we keep inviting in emotional vampires who drain our energy, disrupt our peace, and leave us questioning our worth? What is it about us that signals we’re open for invasion?

We are born with the gift of discernment—but somewhere between loneliness, hope, and our desire to fix the broken, we...

It's healthy to normalize the roller coaster of emotions. I think the key is to feel ALL of it. I don’t want to take this test anymore. So, I need to make sure I’m studying and getting ALL of the lessons out of this class. If I self-medicate, avoid or deny what I feel, I’m not only missing out on the wisdom and power buried within this situation, (which increases the likelihood of me having to repeat this test) but I’m also missing the the entire point of this divorce— to is to grow, liberate myself and...

This is a new game now. Divorce doesn’t just end a relationship — it shifts the entire playing field. But we forget that. We keep showing up with old expectations, old patterns, old wounds.

And here’s where we get to choose: do we keep playing by their rules, or do we start writing our own?

You don't have to match their energy. You don't have to justify, react, or defend.

You get to define your own boundaries, your own rules, your own peace.

It's not about winning the old game. It’s a...

Going through a breakup or divorce? DO NOT do this alone. Starting in June, I’ll have a membership group dedicated to supporting each through breakups. If you are interested in joining this group, let me know in comments.

Have you ever dealt with someone who twists reality, dismisses your feelings, and leaves you questioning your own sanity? Narcissistic gaslighters are energy thieves—draining your peace, manipulating your truth, and leaving you emotionally exhausted.

Gaslighters don’t just lie—they make you feel wrong for noticing and demanding accountability for their lies. Check it out!

Thoughts? Drop a comment or share your experience. #RohoRant #GaslightingAwareness #NarcissisticAbuse #ProtectYourPeace

When love ends, it leaves echoes—memories that linger in the body, mind, and spirit. In this deeply personal episode, grief coach Michelle Haughton joins Dr. Michelle Majors to explore what it means to heal after heartbreak. Whether it’s a breakup, a divorce, or the fading of a deep connection, this conversation reveals how rest becomes an essential act of self-soothing, remembrance, and release. You don’t have to rush your way out of grief—sometimes, the only way through it is to lie still and let your soul catch up.

Its about GROWING through it, not just GOING through it.

This is my reminder to myself and maybe to you that we can’t control other people - only how we respond. People have their own journeys, and as hard as it is, sometimes the kindest thing we can do is step back, get out of the way, let them learn their lessons, and protect our peace.

Trust that they will find their way.

I am CLEAR that one’s healing journey is their own. I also know that we don’t know what we don’t know. So here is some information to consider as you move along on your path toward healing and wholeness.

Be well and discover that deep Roho Rest.

Sauntia Griffin: www.RestoreTherapySeattle.com | Sauntia@RestoreTherapySeattle.com

Disclaimer: Sauntia always clarifies that she is not a physician, and any discussion about supplements is for educational purposes only—to help facilitate informed conversations with your healthcare provider. She strongly recommends consulting your doctor before s...

Trauma teaches us to armor up, stay alert, and keep going—no matter the cost. But what happens when our bodies are finally too tired to fight? In this episode, Michelle Haughton explores what it means to lay down our survival instincts and ease into stillness. Together, we talk about the courage it takes to rest, and how that rest becomes the first sacred step toward healing, wholeness, and letting go.

In this video, I mention:

* My accupuncturist: Dr. Imani - Imani@tubmanhealth.org

* My therapist: Sauntia Griffin - Sauntia@restoretherapyseattle.com/ Restore Therapy Seattle

We are in this together y’all! If you have found something that works for YOU related to brain fog, or insomnia, please comment/share.

Be well.

Its time to change the narrative about resting and taking care of ourselves.

Why do so many of us suffer in silence?

In this episode, @Michelle Haughton shares her personal journey through grief, and why communal rest and emotional release are crucial in moving forward. This is about honoring pain without being consumed by it.

In this powerful three-part series on Roho Rest Hour, Dr. Michelle Majors sits down with grief coach Michelle Haughton to unpack the layered intersections of grief, trauma, and exhaustion—especially for women carrying invisible weight. Together, they explore how rest is not just a pause, but a path to healing. @Michelle Haughton is a...

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