THE ANNALS OF HAROLD
By: HAROLD
Language: en
Categories: Fiction, Comedy, Arts, Books
AUDIO OF THE ANNALS OF HAROLD SUBSTACK haroldrogers.substack.com
Episodes
THE OHIO VALLEY COMEDY TOUR
Oct 27, 2025OV COMEDY TOUR
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ARE U HAPPY?
Oct 20, 2025ARE U HAPPY?
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A TROPICÁLIAN FIRST COMMUNION
Oct 06, 2025MINAS GERAIS DIARY
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HOW I REWROTE "NANA'S FUNERAL :("
Sep 29, 2025HOW I REWROTE NANA'S FUNERAL
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INFINITE JEST LIVE 2
Sep 23, 2025
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INFINITE JEST & ME (PT 2)
Sep 22, 2025INFINITE JEST 2: REALITY PROBLEMS!
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INFINITE JEST LIVE
Sep 16, 2025
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INFINITE JEST & ME
Sep 15, 2025RAN BACK INFINITE JEST
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Live with Eddie Huang
Sep 11, 2025
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THE 12 CAESARS, RANKED
Sep 08, 2025SUETONIUS IS ACTUALLY GOATED
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A SNEEZE OF WAR
Sep 01, 2025ON MY SUETONIUS S**T
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THE 6 MOST UNDERRATED BOOKS OF ALL TIME!
Aug 25, 2025DROPPING SOME KNOWLEDGE ON U FOOLS. . .
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PETTY FASCISTS
Aug 18, 2025ON HAVING IMPREGNABLY THICK SKIN. . .
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ABOLISHING TIME. . .
Aug 15, 2025WROTE A CRAZY-ASS ESSAY ABT TIME VS SPACE, THE HAPSBURGS, AND BOSCH FOR BLAST 2:
BOOKS USED BUT NOT ALWAYS CITED:
ART IN A STATE OF SIEGE (2025), JOSEPH LEO KOERNER
IMPRUDENT KING (2014), & EMPEROR (2019) GEOFFREY PARKER
TERRA NOSTRA (1975), CARLOS FUENTES
PARADISE LOST (1667), JOHN MILTON
DON QUIXOTE (1606), CERVANTES
This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit haroldrogers.substack.com Duration: 00:25:35
SLOTH, SLOTH, SLOTH
Aug 11, 2025ON MANIFESTOS, PUNCH MACHINES, & HOW TO DEFEND URSELF AGAINST OLD LECHERS.
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TRAVELING WITH GABRIELA. . .
Aug 01, 2025AUDIO OF MY TRAVELOGUE IN THE PLACES REVIEW:
READ IT HERE. . .
READ MORE ABT HOW I WROTE IT HERE:
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//ADVENTURES IN THE AVANTGARDE//
Jul 29, 2025HERE IS THE FULL AUDIO OF BOTH PARTS OF MY NOTES TOWARD AN AVANTGARDE MANIFESTO. . .
AND A LIST OF THE 63 BOOKS POSITIVELY MENTIONED. . .
BOOKS MENTIONED:
The Ecclesiastical History of the English People, Venerable Bede (731)
Summa Theologica, Thomas Aquinas (1265–1274)
Tristram Shandy, Laurence Sterne (1759)
Journals, Lewis & Clark (1806)
Moby-Dick, Herman Melville (1851)
Through the Looking-Glass, Lewis Carroll (1871)
The Descent of Man, Charles Darwin (1871)
The Golden Bough, James George Frazer (1890)
The Cantos, Ezra Pound (1915-1962)
The Realms of The Unreal, He...
Duration: 00:54:04//ADVENTURES IN THE AVANTGARDE (2)//
Jul 28, 2025NOTES TOWARD AN AVANTGARDE MANIFESTO 2. . .
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//ADVENTURES IN THE AVANTGARDE (1)//
Jul 21, 2025NOTES TOWARD AN AVANTGARDE MANIFESTO. . .
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12 BOOKS TO MAKE U A MAN
Jul 14, 2025THE TITLE SAYS IT ALL. . .
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HOT DOGS & ETERNITY
Jul 07, 2025DRUNK TRAVOLOGUE
AND READING OF
A SHORT INTRODUCTION TO ANNELIESE (2025) BY JAMES ELKINS,
JOEY CHESTNUT,
THE PAINTER ANGELES SANTOS
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DUDE, THAT YEAR WAS A ZOOOOOOO
Jun 30, 2025ON WEAK IN COMPARISON TO DREAMS (2023) BY JAMES ELKINS:
REVIEW ON SUBSTACK.
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I WON :)
Jun 29, 2025READ MY STORY IN THE METROPOLITAN REVIEW.
AND HERE IS MY POST ABOUT REVISING THE STORY:
HOW I REVISED I WON :)
This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit haroldrogers.substack.com Duration: 00:27:40
GABY VS HUMPTY
Jun 23, 2025ON ART VS LOVE
READ THE WHOLE POST ON SUBSTACK
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MATHIAS ÉNARD'S DIVINE COMEDY
Jun 16, 2025ON MATHIAS ENARD'S
ZONE (2008)
COMPASS (2015)
THE ANNUAL BANQUET OF THE GRAVEDIGGERS' GUILD (2023)
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A SUPPOSEDLY FUN PLACE I'LL NEVER GO AGAIN
Jun 09, 2025I DID AN ALASKAN CRUISE WITH MY FAMILY.
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HALF-ASS REVIEWS OF 5 NEW BOOKS
Jun 02, 2025REVIEWS OF
THE SLEEPERS BY MATTHEW GASDA
VIA ÁPIA BY GEOVANI MARTINS (TR. JULIA SANCHES)
HAPPINESS FOREVER BY ADELAIDE FAITH
THE DESERTERS BY MATHIAS ÉNARD (TR. CHARLOTTE MANDELL)
EVERY LIVING THING BY JASON ROBERTS
This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit haroldrogers.substack.com Duration: 00:16:06
"WAKE YOUR NARCOLEPTIC ASS UP!"
May 26, 20251. NARCOLEPTIC FAUVISM PART 1
It was just a regular, bum-ass, bad vibes, midweek open mic. The most ubiquitous part of being a fledgling comedian in the big city.
There was a dude in the front row wearing a suit.
He was locked in, smiling sprightly even when the comics on the stage were clowning him for nothing more than wearing a suit; he was so bushy-eyed & bright-tailed I thought he must be a newbie.
Though often the newer comics wear the most bitter and acrid faces. I was like that, starting out...
Duration: 00:11:47THE DEVIL IS OTHER PPL
May 19, 2025THE DEVIL IS OTHER PPL. . .
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MRS. DALLOWAY AT 100
May 14, 2025ON THE MRS. DALLOWAY CENTENNIAL
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THE BRODERNIST EPIC
May 12, 2025SCHATTENFROH
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BARBARITY & PERVERSION
May 05, 2025GABY & ME BE ROMPING
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SO WHAT, YOU COACH, BOXING?
Apr 28, 2025YEAH I'M A BOXING COACH, WHAT'S IT TO YA?
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BOYS, BOYS, BOYS
Apr 21, 20251. GABY GONE
Gaby was off to the International Conference of Handsome Young Professionals in Mexico City. Of course I was skeptical of the ICHYP whose website brags,
there is not a greater agglomeration of handsome ambitious young men with money in the entire world!
I asked her, “you’re going to network? in Mexico?”
She responded, while hastily cramming her best outfits into a suitcase, “you never know where these guys can get you a job!”
“Why are you bringing so many bikinis?”
“Pool parties!”
I thought that was...
Duration: 00:12:43NORMAN RUSH IS LOWKEY GOATED
Apr 14, 2025* NOT EVERYONE CAN GO TO THE MOON
We are living in a Doofdom. There is a type that doesn’t seem to exist anymore: let’s call him the Serious Man. Men have abdicated their responsibility to the preservation of our (the culture’s) intellectual patrimony. The reasons for this may be myriad and difficult to pin down, but the truth of it is hard to argue.
Find me a man who really knows something; most of our intelligent stock have devoted themselves to professional corporate usury (mud; mire). The rest are rotting their brains with D...
Duration: 00:41:18THE NUMBERS RACKET
Apr 07, 2025AN EXCERPT FROM MY DAD'S BOOK I, BOOKIE
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THE LIMITS OF BENEVOLENCE
Mar 31, 2025BENEVOLENCE CERTAINLY HAS ITS LIMITS. . .
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PEDRO & VERA MEET
Mar 24, 2025AN EARLY DRAFT OF WHAT WILL BECOME DOM PEDRO & THE CARAVELS (2029). . .
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THE HUMPTY DUMPTY MANIFESTO
Mar 17, 2025THE HUMPTY DUMPTY MANIFESTO
HUMPTY DUMPTY (FSG 2026) BY HAROLD. . .
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MY 28 FAVORITE NOVELS
Mar 14, 2025MY 28 FAVORITE NOVELS
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NANA'S FUNERAL :(
Mar 10, 2025AN ALL-TIME HAROLD CLASSIC:
NANA'S FUNERAL :(
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THE BONFIRE OF THE VANITIES BY TOM WOLFE
Mar 07, 2025BONFIRE OF THE VANITIES. . .
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ROBBERS, GIANTS, GHOSTS
Mar 03, 2025Let’s start easy. Taking our clue from the most notoriously difficult novel of the 20th century, ULYSSES (1922) by James Joyce, with its eminently comprehensible opening paragraph:
Stately, plump Buck Mulligan came from the stairhead, bearing a bowl of lather on which a mirror and a razor lay crossed. A yellow dressinggown, ungirdled, was sustained gently behind him by the mild morning air. He held the bowl aloft and intoned:
—Introibo ad altare Dei.
The novel opens on Stephen Dedalus’s frenemy and soon-to-be-ex-roommate Buck Mulligan who is plump and stately, a rich robust...
Duration: 00:31:55MILKMAN BY ANNA BURNS
Feb 28, 2025MILKMAN BY ANNA BURNS. . .
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N'AUTOFICTION & IRISH OUTBURSTS
Feb 24, 2025WHAT R U SUPPOSED TO WRITE LITERATURE ABT?
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PEDRO & VERA
Feb 17, 2025NO CAP: THIS STORY GOT ME IN TROUBLE. . .
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TOWARD A THEORY OF HOOPLA
Feb 10, 2025*SHAKES FIST AT SKY*
HOOPLA!!!!!!!
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I WON :)
Feb 03, 2025EARLY VERSION OF A STORY PUBLISHED IN THE METROPOLITAN REVIEW. . .
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HOPE IS INSISTENT IN BRASIL
Jan 27, 2025ON
CAROL BENSIMON'S DIORAMA
AND
CARLOS EDUARDO PEREIRA'S AGORA AGORA
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"THAT WAS A LOT, HUH?"
Jan 20, 20251. SILVANA
Rio is the most beautiful city in the world (just edging out New York and Steubenville, Ohio—no I’m not biased), but when you’re expecting scorching inexorable summer sunshine and instead getting a gray block of clouds interrupted occasionally by chilly drizzles, it can make you wanna drink.
The bar (that I described in my last post) on Santa Clara is called Casa Suzanna. The lady who serves drinks from 8AM until 3PM is Silvana. My dad was going there for years, religiously, around lunchtime. He would stack one plastic chair on top of...
Duration: 00:14:03THE PAST BY ALAN PAULS CH 5
Jan 19, 2025RANDOM TRANSLATION. . .
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ANT POISON AT THE WATERFALL
Jan 13, 2025I landed in Rio de Janeiro on Friday morning.
The airport is located on the Ilha do Governador—the Governor’s Island. My mom was born on the Ilha and her ancestors have been dust-to-dusting there for several generations.
Here’s a story my grandma just told me: her grandpa was a surly racist German married to a woman who was the granddaughter of slaves. He owned an ant poison factory on the Island. So one of his children, my grandma’s Uncle Mauri; —this woman said he knocked her up. This was way back then so yo...
Duration: 00:11:48LAURENCE STERNE'S FUTILE & IDLE MEN
Jan 06, 2025ON TRISTRAM SHANDY BY LAURENCE STERNE
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I GOT FACE HERPES FROM WRESTLING
Dec 30, 2024THE TITLE OF THIS ONE KINDA SPEAKS FOR ITSELF. . .
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HAROLD BOOK AWARDS
Dec 26, 2024Putting out a list of your year’s favorite books, I think, is hack and anti-literature; however, I saw Bruna’s Carta para navegantes stack do an awards thing, and I liked reading it, so I have thereby stolen her idea, and I am doing my own version of those awards here:
JOÃO GUIMARÃES ROSA AWARD
(this is named after my favorite writer, the greatest brasilian writer, author of the greatest novel in world literature, Grande Sertão:Veredas—or as it will be known in its new english translation, Vastlands: The Crossing—and it awar...
Duration: 00:18:11"BABY. . . WHO TALKS LIKE THAT?"
Dec 23, 2024I TALK STRANGELY, AT LEAST ACCORDING TO GABY. . .
This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit haroldrogers.substack.com Duration: 00:14:38
PALTRINESS & THE DEVIL
Dec 16, 2024ON GOGOL'S DEAD SOULS
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THE BEGINNING
Dec 09, 2024EARLY VERSION OF HUMPTY, BACK WHEN IT WAS CALLED STEUBENVILLE. . .
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A STEUBENVILLE DIARY
Dec 02, 2024A CLASSIC STB DIARY FEATURING PAUL
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THE LAST JUDGEMENT
Nov 25, 2024ON MACHADO DE ASSIS
YOUR FACE TOMORROW
AND SOME LURID STEUBENVILLE GOSSIP
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"F**K HAROLD!"
Nov 18, 2024HAROLD IS AN A*****E BRO, F**K HIM. . .
This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit haroldrogers.substack.com Duration: 00:11:26